What if? Chapter 7
"I hate you!" Damien screamed just before slamming his bedroom door. Crowley was sitting on the couch in the living room just trying to process everything that happened. He'd been completely honest with Damien and it had ended exactly as well as he thought it would. He sighed heavily and decided to give Damien some time to himself for now. He got up and went out into the garden. It always made him feel better.
"Everything alright, dear?" Angela asked as she walked past the house. She'd gotten to know Crowley over the time he'd been there with his son and it was easy to tell when he wasn't having a good day.
"Not particularly, no." Crowley shook his head. He stopped pruning the rose bush he'd been working on and went to stand at the gate.
"What seems to be the trouble today?" She offered a kind smile. It was nice to have someone to talk to.
"Damien asked me about his biological parents." Crowley shook his head. "It didn't go well."
"Were they not good people?" Angela raised an eyebrow. Crowley never really talked about Damien's parents but everyone knew that he was adopted.
"I know next to nothing about his mother. I couldn't find anything out. His father...." Crowley sighed. "Let's just say he and Charles Manson would get along swimmingly." Crowley made a face. It wasn't exactly a lie.
"Oh. That's....oh." Angela's eyes went a bit wide. She reached up and started to play with the cross necklace she usually wore. "I can see how that wouldn't go well at all."
"I couldn't lie to him." Crowley made a face again. It would have been easier but the truth would come out eventually. Angela reached over the fence and touched Crowley's shoulder.
"You did the right thing, love. I promise. He'll get over it eventually." She smiled. "The important thing is that you were honest with him. And that you have loved him for his entire life. You've been here for him. That's what will matter in the end."
"I really hope so." Crowley said with a nod. All he could do was love the boy and hope that things really would be okay. They had two years until they got to find out. "I should probably go see if he's okay. Wanted to give him a bit of space."
"Yes, go check on him." Angela patted Crowley's shoulder as she nodded. "He's going to need all the love you can give him." She smiled. Crowley just nodded and headed back into the house. He stood outside Damien's bedroom door for a good twenty minutes before he finally knocked lightly.
"Go away!" Damien yelled. Crowley took a deep breath and let it out slowly.
"Can I please come in?" He could just miracle the door unlocked if he wanted to but he was going to respect Damien's space. The whole point was to not push.
"No!" Damien yelled back. "I said go away."
"Alright, I'll leave you alone but I just wanted you to know...." Crowley paused for a second. "I love you, Damien. You're my son and nothing is going to change that. No matter what." He put his hand against the door before he turned and started to walk away. He didn't go very far, though. After a couple of minutes, the bedroom door came open.
"How can you love me knowing what I am?" Damien asked. Crowley looked at him and his heart broke into a million tiny pieces. Puffy red eyes, tears rolling down his cheeks. Crowley wanted to just take the boy into his arms and never let go. He did step a little closer to Damien, though.
"Because you are not your father, Damien." He knelt down so they could be at eye level. "You are who you want to be and nothing else. No one has a right to tell you who or what you are but you."
"But my father...." Damien started. Crowley shook his head.
"Your father has absolutely no say in who you are as a person, Damien. That is entirely up to you." He offered a small smile. "And you are a brilliant, sweet, wonderful boy who loves his friends and this village very much." Damien was quiet for a few minutes and he tentatively walked closer to Crowley.
"I don't really hate you." He said quietly. Crowley put a hand on Damien's cheek, smiling a little more.
"I never thought you did."
"I'm sorry." Damien said, his voice a little shaky, as he practically threw himself into Crowley's arms. Crowley just wrapped him up in a warm hug and held him close, one hand going up to gently stroke his hair.
"You have absolutely nothing to apologize for, my boy. Nothing at all." He was starting to get a bit teary himself. "I just want you to always remember that I love you, no matter what. Okay?"
"I love you, too, dad." Damien sniffled a little. That was what was important. Not his father, but his dad. The man that was there. Nothing else mattered.
"Everything alright, dear?" Angela asked as she walked past the house. She'd gotten to know Crowley over the time he'd been there with his son and it was easy to tell when he wasn't having a good day.
"Not particularly, no." Crowley shook his head. He stopped pruning the rose bush he'd been working on and went to stand at the gate.
"What seems to be the trouble today?" She offered a kind smile. It was nice to have someone to talk to.
"Damien asked me about his biological parents." Crowley shook his head. "It didn't go well."
"Were they not good people?" Angela raised an eyebrow. Crowley never really talked about Damien's parents but everyone knew that he was adopted.
"I know next to nothing about his mother. I couldn't find anything out. His father...." Crowley sighed. "Let's just say he and Charles Manson would get along swimmingly." Crowley made a face. It wasn't exactly a lie.
"Oh. That's....oh." Angela's eyes went a bit wide. She reached up and started to play with the cross necklace she usually wore. "I can see how that wouldn't go well at all."
"I couldn't lie to him." Crowley made a face again. It would have been easier but the truth would come out eventually. Angela reached over the fence and touched Crowley's shoulder.
"You did the right thing, love. I promise. He'll get over it eventually." She smiled. "The important thing is that you were honest with him. And that you have loved him for his entire life. You've been here for him. That's what will matter in the end."
"I really hope so." Crowley said with a nod. All he could do was love the boy and hope that things really would be okay. They had two years until they got to find out. "I should probably go see if he's okay. Wanted to give him a bit of space."
"Yes, go check on him." Angela patted Crowley's shoulder as she nodded. "He's going to need all the love you can give him." She smiled. Crowley just nodded and headed back into the house. He stood outside Damien's bedroom door for a good twenty minutes before he finally knocked lightly.
"Go away!" Damien yelled. Crowley took a deep breath and let it out slowly.
"Can I please come in?" He could just miracle the door unlocked if he wanted to but he was going to respect Damien's space. The whole point was to not push.
"No!" Damien yelled back. "I said go away."
"Alright, I'll leave you alone but I just wanted you to know...." Crowley paused for a second. "I love you, Damien. You're my son and nothing is going to change that. No matter what." He put his hand against the door before he turned and started to walk away. He didn't go very far, though. After a couple of minutes, the bedroom door came open.
"How can you love me knowing what I am?" Damien asked. Crowley looked at him and his heart broke into a million tiny pieces. Puffy red eyes, tears rolling down his cheeks. Crowley wanted to just take the boy into his arms and never let go. He did step a little closer to Damien, though.
"Because you are not your father, Damien." He knelt down so they could be at eye level. "You are who you want to be and nothing else. No one has a right to tell you who or what you are but you."
"But my father...." Damien started. Crowley shook his head.
"Your father has absolutely no say in who you are as a person, Damien. That is entirely up to you." He offered a small smile. "And you are a brilliant, sweet, wonderful boy who loves his friends and this village very much." Damien was quiet for a few minutes and he tentatively walked closer to Crowley.
"I don't really hate you." He said quietly. Crowley put a hand on Damien's cheek, smiling a little more.
"I never thought you did."
"I'm sorry." Damien said, his voice a little shaky, as he practically threw himself into Crowley's arms. Crowley just wrapped him up in a warm hug and held him close, one hand going up to gently stroke his hair.
"You have absolutely nothing to apologize for, my boy. Nothing at all." He was starting to get a bit teary himself. "I just want you to always remember that I love you, no matter what. Okay?"
"I love you, too, dad." Damien sniffled a little. That was what was important. Not his father, but his dad. The man that was there. Nothing else mattered.
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