I remember
"Aziraphale!" Nithael called as he ran through the streets of Heaven. He had to find his friend. The battled was already starting and he knew that he'd be dragged onto the rebellious side. He'd been hanging out with Lucifer and the others and it was only a matter of time. "Aziraphale!" He called again.
"What is it?" Aziraphale asked as he stepped out of the great library. Of course his friend would be there. Nithael ran up to the other angel and pulled him into a tight hug. He didn't want to let go. Maybe they could hide in the library and everything would be okay.
"It's started." Nithael said softly as he just held onto Aziraphale like his life depended on it. Perhaps it did.
"Oh." Aziraphale responded. There was no need for an explanation of what had started. They'd been talking about it a lot the last few days.
"I need you to do something for me, Aziraphale." Nithael moved back just a little, but he kept his hands on Aziraphale's arms.
"Anything." Aziraphale smiled softly. He reached one hand up to touch Nithael's cheek. He did so loved the red haired angel.
"You're not going to like it." Nithael closed his eyes and nuzzled the hand on his cheek. He was going to miss that.
"What is it you need me to do?" Aziraphale furrowed his brow. He was worried. Nithael took a deep breath and let it out slowly before opening his eyes and looking at Aziraphale.
"No matter what happens, no matter how things end.....I need you to let me go." He cleared his throat trying to keep his emotions under control. Angels weren't supposed to have emotions. Not really.
"What? Nithael I can't..." Aziraphale started. Nithael shook his head.
"You have to let me go, Zira. Do not come after me, do not defend me. Don't...." He shook his head again. "I don't know what's going to happen but it's not going to be good. I need you to....I don't know. Pretend you don't know me." He sighed heavily.
"Everyone knows that we're friends...." Aziraphale started. Quite a bit more than that if they were both honest.
"Then you'll have to disown me. Tell them we're not friends anymore." There were tears forming in Nithael's eyes. "I just.....I don't want you to get dragged into this too."
"I can't just let you go, Nithael. I....I love you." Aziraphale said softly. He took both of Nithael's hands in his and held them tightly. He wasn't making this easy at all.
"I love you, too. More than you can know." Nithael closed his eyes again. "I am always going to love you, Aziraphale. It's just....things already don't look good for Lucifer's side and....I can't get away from them." He squeezed Aziraphale's hands and then put a hand on the other angel's cheek. "Please. You have to just....forget about me. I don't want you to end up getting punished just because you knew me."
"But why can't you get away from them? We could run away together. Let them sort it out. It has nothing to do with us." Aziraphale was desperate. He didn't want to lose his love.
"Run away together?" Nithael was slightly amused at that.
"Yes. You and me. We don't need the rest of them. We could just go hide away somewhere. Alpha Centauri maybe? Just the two of us." Aziraphale gripped Nithael's hand tightly.
"That would be really nice." Nithael nodded. He knew it could never be, though. Not really. "I'm so sorry, Zira. I really am." He sighed.
"Please.....you don't have to do this. You don't have to join them." Aziraphale was starting to tear up himself. Nithael moved his hand to the back of Aziraphale's head and pulled him into a kiss. Angel's weren't supposed to know about that. About passion and love and kissing and everything that came along with it. But there it was. Aziraphale and Nithael kissed as if they would never see each other again. When the kiss broke, they rested their foreheads against each other.
"I'm sorry." Nithael said, his voice shaking. "Please, just let me go." He held onto Aziraphale a little bit longer before he vanished. Aziraphale did as Nithael asked. He disavowed their friendship. Let him be cast out without a single word in defense of his friend. It took him about a thousand years to get over hating himself for that.
"We could run away together." Crowley said while they were in the bandstand.
"Run away....together?" Aziraphale asked, looking at his friend. There was a tingle at the back of his mind. Something akin to deja vu but he wasn't quite sure why. He just ignored it as the conversation went on. And then they were fighting and then the end of the world almost happened but didn't. They faced Heaven and Hell and came out of it in one piece, thanks to Agnes, and then they had nothing but time on their hands.
"Oh....." Aziraphale said as they were sitting in his bookshop. Crowley was lounging on the couch and Aziraphale was sitting at his desk going through a new old book he'd just gotten in.
"Yes?" Crowley asked with a smirk and a raised eyebrow.
"Oh, nothing. Sorry. Just.....a memory. I think." Aziraphale furrowed his brow.
"Come on, angel, share with the class." Crowley said with a slight chuckle. Aziraphale was quiet for a long moment.
"When you were asking me to run away with you. In the bandstand. To Alpha Centauri you said." Aziraphale took his purely decorative glasses off and set them on the desk.
"That was three years ago, angel." Crowley was very confused now. "Why is this coming to mind now?"
"Well, it seemed to trigger something. That conversation. It felt like I'd had it before just....not quite the same." Aziraphale got up and went over to sit next to Crowley on the couch.
"Okay...." Crowley shifted so Aziraphale could sit and just stared at him for a moment. Aziraphale was trying to put his thoughts together.
"Well, I....um.....it seems I've just remembered why it felt that way." He looked down at his hands as he spoke. "I had a very similar conversation with someone else a very long time ago. Only....I was the one asking them to run away." Aziraphale looked up when Crowley didn't respond. He just looked into the demon's brilliant yellow eyes as they sat there in silence. After a moment, Crowley's bottom lip actually started to tremble and Aziraphale could see tears welling up in his eyes. He reached out and put a hand on Crowley's arm, concern written all over his face.
"I um...." Crowley cleared his throat trying to keep his voice steady. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath before whispering softly. "I was hoping you wouldn't remember." Crowley kept his eyes closed. He didn't want to see the look on Aziraphale's face.
"All this time...." Aziraphale said softly, putting a hand on Crowley's cheek. "You knew..."
"It's why I approached you at the wall. I knew you wouldn't hurt me. I just didn't expect...well....the rest." Crowley chuckled softly before opening his eyes. There was a mixture of emotion in the blue eyes staring back at him. The beautiful blue eyes that he'd often gotten lost in before his fall. Aziraphale didn't say anything. He just pulled Crowley into a kiss that mirrored the first kiss they shared what seemed like eons ago.
"What is it?" Aziraphale asked as he stepped out of the great library. Of course his friend would be there. Nithael ran up to the other angel and pulled him into a tight hug. He didn't want to let go. Maybe they could hide in the library and everything would be okay.
"It's started." Nithael said softly as he just held onto Aziraphale like his life depended on it. Perhaps it did.
"Oh." Aziraphale responded. There was no need for an explanation of what had started. They'd been talking about it a lot the last few days.
"I need you to do something for me, Aziraphale." Nithael moved back just a little, but he kept his hands on Aziraphale's arms.
"Anything." Aziraphale smiled softly. He reached one hand up to touch Nithael's cheek. He did so loved the red haired angel.
"You're not going to like it." Nithael closed his eyes and nuzzled the hand on his cheek. He was going to miss that.
"What is it you need me to do?" Aziraphale furrowed his brow. He was worried. Nithael took a deep breath and let it out slowly before opening his eyes and looking at Aziraphale.
"No matter what happens, no matter how things end.....I need you to let me go." He cleared his throat trying to keep his emotions under control. Angels weren't supposed to have emotions. Not really.
"What? Nithael I can't..." Aziraphale started. Nithael shook his head.
"You have to let me go, Zira. Do not come after me, do not defend me. Don't...." He shook his head again. "I don't know what's going to happen but it's not going to be good. I need you to....I don't know. Pretend you don't know me." He sighed heavily.
"Everyone knows that we're friends...." Aziraphale started. Quite a bit more than that if they were both honest.
"Then you'll have to disown me. Tell them we're not friends anymore." There were tears forming in Nithael's eyes. "I just.....I don't want you to get dragged into this too."
"I can't just let you go, Nithael. I....I love you." Aziraphale said softly. He took both of Nithael's hands in his and held them tightly. He wasn't making this easy at all.
"I love you, too. More than you can know." Nithael closed his eyes again. "I am always going to love you, Aziraphale. It's just....things already don't look good for Lucifer's side and....I can't get away from them." He squeezed Aziraphale's hands and then put a hand on the other angel's cheek. "Please. You have to just....forget about me. I don't want you to end up getting punished just because you knew me."
"But why can't you get away from them? We could run away together. Let them sort it out. It has nothing to do with us." Aziraphale was desperate. He didn't want to lose his love.
"Run away together?" Nithael was slightly amused at that.
"Yes. You and me. We don't need the rest of them. We could just go hide away somewhere. Alpha Centauri maybe? Just the two of us." Aziraphale gripped Nithael's hand tightly.
"That would be really nice." Nithael nodded. He knew it could never be, though. Not really. "I'm so sorry, Zira. I really am." He sighed.
"Please.....you don't have to do this. You don't have to join them." Aziraphale was starting to tear up himself. Nithael moved his hand to the back of Aziraphale's head and pulled him into a kiss. Angel's weren't supposed to know about that. About passion and love and kissing and everything that came along with it. But there it was. Aziraphale and Nithael kissed as if they would never see each other again. When the kiss broke, they rested their foreheads against each other.
"I'm sorry." Nithael said, his voice shaking. "Please, just let me go." He held onto Aziraphale a little bit longer before he vanished. Aziraphale did as Nithael asked. He disavowed their friendship. Let him be cast out without a single word in defense of his friend. It took him about a thousand years to get over hating himself for that.
"We could run away together." Crowley said while they were in the bandstand.
"Run away....together?" Aziraphale asked, looking at his friend. There was a tingle at the back of his mind. Something akin to deja vu but he wasn't quite sure why. He just ignored it as the conversation went on. And then they were fighting and then the end of the world almost happened but didn't. They faced Heaven and Hell and came out of it in one piece, thanks to Agnes, and then they had nothing but time on their hands.
"Oh....." Aziraphale said as they were sitting in his bookshop. Crowley was lounging on the couch and Aziraphale was sitting at his desk going through a new old book he'd just gotten in.
"Yes?" Crowley asked with a smirk and a raised eyebrow.
"Oh, nothing. Sorry. Just.....a memory. I think." Aziraphale furrowed his brow.
"Come on, angel, share with the class." Crowley said with a slight chuckle. Aziraphale was quiet for a long moment.
"When you were asking me to run away with you. In the bandstand. To Alpha Centauri you said." Aziraphale took his purely decorative glasses off and set them on the desk.
"That was three years ago, angel." Crowley was very confused now. "Why is this coming to mind now?"
"Well, it seemed to trigger something. That conversation. It felt like I'd had it before just....not quite the same." Aziraphale got up and went over to sit next to Crowley on the couch.
"Okay...." Crowley shifted so Aziraphale could sit and just stared at him for a moment. Aziraphale was trying to put his thoughts together.
"Well, I....um.....it seems I've just remembered why it felt that way." He looked down at his hands as he spoke. "I had a very similar conversation with someone else a very long time ago. Only....I was the one asking them to run away." Aziraphale looked up when Crowley didn't respond. He just looked into the demon's brilliant yellow eyes as they sat there in silence. After a moment, Crowley's bottom lip actually started to tremble and Aziraphale could see tears welling up in his eyes. He reached out and put a hand on Crowley's arm, concern written all over his face.
"I um...." Crowley cleared his throat trying to keep his voice steady. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath before whispering softly. "I was hoping you wouldn't remember." Crowley kept his eyes closed. He didn't want to see the look on Aziraphale's face.
"All this time...." Aziraphale said softly, putting a hand on Crowley's cheek. "You knew..."
"It's why I approached you at the wall. I knew you wouldn't hurt me. I just didn't expect...well....the rest." Crowley chuckled softly before opening his eyes. There was a mixture of emotion in the blue eyes staring back at him. The beautiful blue eyes that he'd often gotten lost in before his fall. Aziraphale didn't say anything. He just pulled Crowley into a kiss that mirrored the first kiss they shared what seemed like eons ago.
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